How having a baby girl changed my life
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How having a baby girl changed my life

Published Mon Nov 20 2023

It’s been about six weeks since my baby girl, Augusta was born! The event was surreal and for sure one of the best moments in my life with my wife that we both shared! As I'm typing about this event, words can’t do justice to this magical moment!

When I saw my baby coming out, and the midwife nurse grabbing the baby from Dilara and putting her in her chest, I just couldn't believe it! I was in shock.

For guys and women it’s so much different because leading up to her birth, I could never see her or feel her like Dilara could inside of her belly. I could feel her move but for us guys who are visual, it hit me completely differently when I saw her come out.

When I finally held her, I started getting emotional. Tears started running through my eyes and I felt my heart opening up and feeling heavy, a new love overflowing through my body, and my veins. I didn’t think I could love a little tiny human so unconditionally!

I was just feeling so grateful, so happy, and so blessed! I thanked God for giving us an amazing gift from above. It’s hard to put it into words, but whenever you have a baby with your significant other you will understand what I mean. When I kept holding her, I still couldn't believe she was all mine.

One of the things that I felt about life was that I wanted to become a better person. Even better than I was before. Become a better husband, father, and overall human being.

Having a girl I wanted to protect my little baby from this world, to provide for her, to teach her how to be a good little lady. My motivation and my purpose went 10X! I already had so much motivation from within but after, it reached new heights!

Another thought that flashed in my head after Auggie was born was that in life, there are always people who rub you the wrong way or have some tension with you.

I feel that having a baby eliminated all of that. My mind was like, "Why do I think like this or still feel like that." That’s truly not important anymore. I want to show more love and be more kind, even to the people who have done me wrong or have done XYZ to me in the past. I want to be more loving and genuine about how I go about my life now.

There's no reason to feel like this anymore. Life’s too short to feel those types of things. I felt like some weight was lifted off my back and started thinking about how I wanted to become more like Jesus and the stuff he says and does.

One example he says in Matthew 5:44 “But I say unto you, love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them that despitefully use you and persecute you.”

Obviously, there’s no way I can be like Jesus. I’m not perfect but my goal is to be more like him. My faith got stronger with God and I felt a new refreshing feeling of feeling full of love in my heart, my spirit, and my soul.

I also had another life-changing moment that happened to me.

Just looking at my baby girl who is so delicate, so innocent, so helpless. I started thinking about this world we live in.

The crazy world that is filled with so much evil and chaos. I started thinking about how most women’s problems in life come from not having a father who is present in their lives that actually raises them right and gives them the love that they need and for a lot of women, this causes so many problems for their future.

I started having more of a soft side for women who had a lot of problems as adults and are single and most of them who've I studied of why they became like this was because of remote fathers and poor parenting.

I looked into the future of my baby girl being an adult and her having her own family and being in one big happy family with us. Who would I want for her to marry? To settle with.

And a flash came into my life of all the men out there in the world who treat women wrong and deceive women.

I’m not saying all men do this but several men, do this and praise other men that they are a “real man” if they have a woman and are cheating on them with other girls. I would never want her to be with the type of insecure man who does this.

They lead women into pretending they want a relationship when they actually don’t want that at all. "Would I want some guy who was with my daughter and yet cheating on her and being with other women on the side?" Absolutely not!!

So I realized that for her to be a good girl and understand what is good and bad, she needs to see how true love is with her mom and dad and be raised right.

I started thinking about what I do in my coaching and consulting business. And how many lives I have helped and transformed. I’ve helped a couple of men marry their life partners or several men get into long-term relationships.

I’ve also helped other men who didn’t want that and just wanted more “fun” at the beginning of my career and it just did not feel good. I came to a crossroads in my life where I was done helping those men even though I got paid well.

That’s not who I am and what I stand for. From now on, I’m only going to help the good men out there who are also looking for their life partner so that they can get married and be in a meaningful fulfilling relationship and will be good husbands and good leaders.

Be faithful, good communicators, have good values, emotionally available, and want to put in the emotional work with their wives. Also with men who want to strengthen their relationships with their partner or wives.

These are the types of men I will now only work with and accept. If guys come to me and just want casual stuff, I’m not their guy.

I also started thinking more about the women’s side of things. And started thinking about all the women who are looking for their husbands and want a life partner to settle down with. To have a family or raise kids with. I started thinking about all the problems that they have when it comes to their love lives.

How many of them end up choosing the wrong guys who don’t have the same intentions as them yet they feel drawn to these charming guys who from the surface are charismatic, people are drawn to them, they are smooth talkers, etc, etc but yet they don't want marriage and how that destroys so many women.

And then they break their hearts and women end up picking other guys like this and this keeps happening because the nice guys that have all the good qualities can’t attract women. They just don’t have the skills, so women keep going after the wrong men and keep hurting themselves over and over until some might just give up on love.

Before having Auggie, because I also have a matchmaking business in SD and OC, I always talk to women and consult with them and they always tell me the same thing that I just mentioned. I already have helped a couple of women with their dating lives but never took it to the level of advertising that I want to help them.

But at this point in my life, I want to help these women who want a husband and a meaningful relationship. I don't want to sound conceited, but I feel that there’s no one in this world that could do a better job than me. I used to be that guy who never wanted to commit, who got cheated on, got hurt, and never wanted to settle.

I am a man and know how men think and act. I know exactly what women need to do to date intentionally and see if the guy is actually in it for the long haul or if he’s just another weasel and a stepping stone to Mr Right.

Sometimes women can get all caught up in their feelings of feeling different types of ways for these emotionally unavailable men. Having a man's perspective is a game-changer and goes such a long way that it's not even funny.

Showing women how to date right and find the right man without wasting so much time, how men think, how they behave, and what lies behind the surface area and getting into the deep depths of his soul.

His real intentions, his wounds, etc. At this point, I’m going to start helping only men who want marriage and also women who are looking for long-term partners and faithful husbands. I have opened up that door and it has made me feel so good in my conscience.

When I made that decision I started telling my wife about this, and she supported me and told me she knows that I could change women's lives since I changed her life and has seen what I've done with other women whom I've helped already.

I got her support and I'm ready for this next phase of my life! God, Meaningful family, Meaningful life, meaningful relationships, serving people. Serving Christ and becoming the example of what good men should be in this modern world.

To my wife and daughter Auggie. Daddy will always be there for you guys to love, protect, and provide for you guys:)