|
|
| Dating University |
|
 |
|
|
Dating at Midlife: Whats First?
More American women over 45 are single, than ever before. According to the latest population surveys, someone turns 50 every 8 seconds in the U.S. and more than half of that figure is female. According to Christian Science Monitor writer, Marilyn Gardner, "To newly minted singles coming out of long marriages, the prospect of dating can be daunting." At the initial phase of dating, the boomer woman may want to ask herself, "why date?" In other words, what is the objective? In 2003, AARP conducted a study asking participants why they dated and found "the single most important...reason...is to have someone to talk to or do things with." This reason accounted for almost half of the singles in the study. One woman from an email group didn't agree, "If these two reasons were the only reason for a woman to date it might be less complicated if she ran around with another woman instead of a man. She wouldn't have to worry about giving the guy the wrong signals. If I dated a guy it would also be because I found him sexually attractive," she said. Other reasons from the study included: to have fun, find a partner, find someone to marry and to fulfill sexual needs. Understanding why you want to date is an important first step in the process. This gives you a clear objective and eliminates unnecessary time spent in relationships that have nothing to do with your objective. In addition to dating motivations, the new single should consider what type of relationship they want. Susan Dunn, EQ coach of Momentum Coaching asks, "Companionship without commitment? Is that with or without sex? Do you want long-term and sex? Is that with or without commitment? Friend with benefits? Benefits without friendship? Marriage? Is that marriage with or without fidelity?" Once you know what you want, you can learn to ask for what you want. Don't be shy when you begin dating, the time (and heart) you save is your own. Knowing when you're ready to date is just as important as why. Generally, experience and distance from relationships gives a person not just a needed break, but also some insight into their motivations and what they need from a relationship. If you're going to step out again here are a few things to consider: If you have these three collared, you're ready to get back out there. Carla R. Herrera is a freelance writer and author of The Contemporary Woman's Guide to Midlife: Essays and Resources for Life Transitions. She's currently working on her next book, Contemporary Woman's Guide to Midlife Dating and publishes an online magazine for midlife women, 40+
Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Single Women Are Hot Just when businesses and advertisers think they have women all figured out enters a new category with serious buying power: the single woman. It is projected that in 2005 single women will spend $400 million dollars which has the business world standing up and taking notice. The Freedom to Exist This article will seem like just good old plain common sense. Yet, most people in business of giving advice in dating and seduction are not really addressing it and I know it is a problem for most men. Mens Guide To Online Dating Success. Secret Seduction Tips Revealed! Looking To Meet Women? Craving Female Company? Guys, Do Your Pickup Lines Always Get Met with Turn Downs? It's unbelievable how many guys have this problem! Why Do So Many People Date Online? Once upon a time, online dating was a last resort, a joke of sorts for singles. Today, that is no longer the case. Millions of singles are now looking online for relationships. The reasons behind this new trend in dating are numerous. Dating Rules - Show Tolerance, be Easy You should show a tolerant and open-minded attitude towards many subjects. Imagine the following sentences: Inexpensive Dating Ideas Dating and saving money. For many, the two concepts don't equate. There's an automatic reaction for most when suggesting the two together that the person paying is trying to be "cheap" and the resulting date will naturally have the same feel. Contrary to popular belief, however, dating doesn't have to be expensive to be fun, entertaining and memorable. It doesn't even have to take a whole lot of extra preparation time. What it does take is a little imagination and breaking from the typical date routine. You have to be willing to think beyond dinner and a movie and be willing to try something new for a change. Here are 15 inexpensive dating ideas: 10 for anyone plus 5 for the adventurous. Where Should You Go On The First Date? One of the most frequently asked questions in the history of dating (with the exception of the caveman who was a firm believer in kidnapping and always took his date to a filthy cave) is where should one go on a first date. For starters, there are several places you shouldn't even think about going on a first date. They are listed below in order of "you'll die alone" rankings. Saying What You Really Want To Say Have you ever been talking to someone you are interested in dating and wished you had put your shoe in your mouth instead of saying anything at all? Or have you wanted to tell someone that you like them, but not known how to do it? If you have you are normal. Seriously, many people dont always say things the way they want to say them. If you want to overcome this problem consider the following suggestions. Flattery Will Get You Everywhere Flattery will get you everywhere! Always compliment women and they will always feel good about you, but don't overdue it or they will think your just trying to score points (which you are, but you don't want them to know that). How to Flirt and Never Get Rejected! When it comes to flirting, you can get your point across very easily just using your eyes. Take a moment and watch people who are in love. See how they look at each other - they stare directly into each other's eys for extended periods of time. Look at mere friends. See their eyes? They seem to flit back and forth, making eye contact, but never extended eye contact. Finding Your Dream Date Sometimes Takes Guts! My husband and I used to live in NYC. WE would often take dog for a walk last night to get her and us exercise. If you've ever lived in NYC, you know there is never any way to know what excitement that you will wander upon. This particular night, we heard some deep gospel sounds coming from a park near Lincoln Center so we wandered over to check out the event. Best Places to go on a Date Does the waiter know how you like your steak, and more about your love life than you do yourself? You are stuck in a "boring-dates syndrome"! Or perhaps you are conducting a psychological experiment on the people you date, and trying to keep the environment constant... It is at least good your haven't just given up on trying yet! Perhaps this is not quite you, but you do feel bored with your dating life, or you stopped dating all together. Say My Name Surely you remember that famous line from American Pie, when the band geek says to Jim, "Say my name, Bi*ch!" And Jim squeaks back, "Michelle! Michelle!" Well, take heed, fellows. That band geek was asking for what many of us ladies want to hear, and not just in the heat of the moment. Should You Consider an Internet Romance? Carly's quest in finding a suitable partner for marriage seemed impossible. She found the singles scene at clubs to be uncomfortable and her social circle seemed to consist of more married friends with a shrinking amount of singles. A Revolution Has Come To Online Dating There is truly a revolution going on in the online dating services industry. And it is one that is far overdue. For years online dating has been provided by websites that provide access to dating profiles, addresses and emails for a monthly fee. Revealed: What Women Want When It Comes to a Guys Looks As part of my research for a guide to style, I put together a focus group of 6 randomly chosen hot, single women between 21 and 33, to find out what styles in men they considered hot. Have You Lost That Loving Feeling? Would you like to discover Easy and Creative ideas to enhance & create romance ! How To Find A Dating Web Site That Is Right For You Today Starting From Scratch So at last you're sick and tired of the bar scene, and now you want to find a dating web site that's right for you, but you don't know where to begin! No worries let us take you through a few options available and see what dating site will fit your plans! Do You Desire Love and Marriage? How Should You Prepare Yourself? The rate of new love and marriages is rising as fast as the divorce rate. That forces the question ? are people really falling in love? If they are then why is the divorce rate so high? Isn't love enough? Where is the commitment? Love and marriage are still important to people. So what is the deal? Why is the divorce rate still climbing?
|
| home | site map |
| © 2009 |
